BDB Talk

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the power (or lack of) of wlw

Do you feel we as wlw have any real power in society?

Strangely enough, yes, I feel we do. I think by living our lives outside the heteronormative framework, we automatically give patriarchy a thumbs-up. We are living examples of the fact that there are other ways to be, and this holds true irrespective of where we live, what we do, etc. I guess, it holds true for anyone, anywhere doing anything that goes against tradition.

For instance, when I was a kid, I thought that everyone grew up, got jobs, got married, had kids, and the cycle repeated. (Also men married women and vice-versa.) Yet something deep inside me rebelled at the thought of conforming. I knew I was supposed to want it, but it made me sick and I didn't know why. Today, my neices and nephews (I include kids of close friends in that) see in the way I live a different sort of reality. For them, I am that living example of you-can-do-what-you-want. I think that is power. I feel that you can change the world a tiny bit by tiny bit by just being yourself; if you can wave placards, get governments to change laws, that's fantastic. But being true to yourself is incredibly powerful in itself.

[Phew. *gets off soapbox*]